omg shut up

so my piano teacher is REALLY pissing me off right now. she's like 60 years old and she doesn't understand why i like guitar better (well, she's biased, but she tells me it's more convenient to play piano and that piano is MUCH better for all kinds of music). so that sucks because i do like guitar and i want to learn it.

and then she doesn't understand pop music and keeps making me confused with where i am in the song, like i'm getting off back into another verse and she's like "NO NO NO" and points me into the bridge. and then another time she leads me from a verse to the end of the song, which repeats the last few lyrics and it's obvious that it goes off from the end of the chorus.

and then she calls the notes doe ray mee and all those which i don't understand because i'm used to c d e and all that, so whenever she says see flat i move to c flat and she's like "NO, SEE FLAT" and i'm like "i AM on c flat" and ughh

and then she marks right over my NEW BOOKS which i actually intend to play fun out of and it pisses me off, thank god she's not teaching me guitar because if anyone marks over my green day book i'd spaz

and i'm a horrible note-reader, and my concentration goes funny when i try to read notes so sometimes i wind up staring at the note and spacing out for a few seconds while also trying to remember the note and then she says what it is in the funny note names and by then i've usually gotten it and then she says it and i lose it and it's like "OMG SHUT UP BITCH"

she also assigns scales that are so easy i've forgotten and she treats me like a 5-year-old when i'm in reality 13 years old.

and then as she left she told me i didn't practice enough and that computer was causing all the problems and i should practice the second i get home from school and leave the computer off so i don't forget and i'm like "computer is not the problem, okay?" and she's like "yes it is, you can check your email later" and i'm like "it's not email", and she said "whatever it is just don't go on so you don't forget" and i'm like "i have a messed up mind, i'd forget anyways" ('cause i have adhd, my mind is messed up and i forget like everything) and she's like, "no you wouldn't, you're very smart without that machine", and i said, "computer is not the problem," and she left with, "then prove it to me next week"

OMG SHUT THE FUCK UP LADY WHAT THE FUCKING BUSINESS DO YOU HAVE TO GET INTO MY PERSONAL FUCKING LIFE?
NONE.
AT ALL.

IT SUCKS THAT YOU'RE EVEN COMING TO MY FUCKING HOUSE EVERY WEEK.

SO YEAH.

SHUT THE FUCK UP.

and my mother isn't helping because she keeps screaming at me and just now she came in and asked me if i had my science homework done and i was like "what science homework?" and she says "cells?" and i said "oh ... i didn't know that was homework" and she said, "you have to try harder not to forget things, you have to cooroperate" and i wanted to scream "I AM FUCKING TRYING" but i didn't, i mean, i know my mom loves me and she's trying to help me but it's not working if she yells at me :/ and i am trying, but i have a severe case of add and a moderate case of adhd, so it's really really hard, especially if i can't stop moving and stuff

UGH

i mean, most of my friends are on the internet, and most of them i trust completely, i've seen pictures and i have their facebooks and all, and i've even met one of them on a trip (that was probably one of the best days of this year, despite being on an airplane for 2 hours and driving for 3) so it's really annoying when you're seperated from your friends in that way, and i communicate with my offline friends on the computer mostly

so that really pisses me off that people who i don't even know and people who i do know are trying to keep me from my friends and half my life (okay, i have no life, i admit)

so yeah, i'm pissed off

thank god that's a mood